Two weeks ago, I attended a mind-blowing parenting programme called “Space of a Child” conducted by the Head of Enlightening Education, Ma Rishi Advaitananda from Nthyananda Dhyanapeeta. In that 3-hour session, it created so much awareness in me as a parent and literally at the end of the session, I came out feeling that every parent on planet earth should have this knowledge and understanding of the “Space of a Child”!
For parents, you probably would have realized this by now – being a parent is one of the most challenging responsibilities we have undertaken because there is no preparation from life for being a parent and each child is different. We just give birth to a new life and the next thing we have to go figure out how to raise a child through trial and error. No amount of parenting courses or support groups out there can fully prepare us for this task because there is a deeper mystery about life that we need to understand as parents.
That mystery is the “Space of a child”. What do I mean by the space of a child?
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After I got back from the Inner Awakening retreat in end December, lately I’ve experienced a breakthrough in my relationship with my son, Kai which really made me feel so fulfilled. Our relationship had always been very loving, friendly with mutual respect but there were times when I would lose my ‘cool’ in anger with his laziness or insensitive behaviors. Before the start of the retreat, I told him that I would drop my anger engram (engraved memory).
During the retreat, I was given the 4 great tattwas (spiritual values) of Integrity, Authenticity, Responsibility and Enriching Others, just working on myself with these truths, I saw the anger engram started to lose power over me. There is a constant awareness within to allow me to witness my thoughts and words. It is as if I’ve entered into a new space and now I am beginning to see auspicious things are gathering around me. Besides attracting new business opportunities, I could see some of my close relationships also got healed as I started living these truths.
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This week while checking on my 9 y.o. son’s school bag, I discovered an English assignment which he did on “I love you forever”, he wrote this:- “Dear mum, I will love you in the entire space, not even if you scold me, I still love you. Next time, I will always follow you and you are my best mum I ever had. I feel so lucky when my mum cooks yummy food for me. Love, Kai “ This was such an affirmation for the decision I made 3 years ago to quit my corporate life and to spend more time with Kai. The fulfillment within is really sweet.
Like many modern women, I was deeply torn between my career and my desire to be there for my child several years ago. As current day parents, we are often tied up with so many environmental and societal pressures of being attached to work and money in the materialistic pursuits. For the first 6 years of my son’s life, I was a working mum doing a regional job but I was lucky enough to be supported by a trusted domestic caretaker who really took great care of my son. However, we all know that we can’t possibly sub-contract a mother’s responsibilities to an outsider because fundamentally, parents are the first role model of a child and we have the responsibility in giving them the foundation of possibilities.
When a woman feels this crack in her inner space, she naturally carries the heaviness of guilt inside her heart which makes it impossible for her to have fulfilment in her life. If this crack is not addressed, a woman could fall into anxiety and depression. Having struggled through this major cross-road myself, I am glad that I always find the right guidance through spiritual solutions. After all, we are relating with another intelligent spiritual being.
In this article, I would like to share with all mothers as well as women who work with children, the 10 golden lessons that I learnt from my own journey of motherhood. Of course, motherhood is a life-long process, so I can only share whatever I imbibed at this moment. Please only take whatever resonates with you.
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