Ability to trust before I jump!

Posted on by Teo Siew Yong

This year after my return from the last retreat in India with my Guru – Paramahamsa Nithyananda (fondly known as Swamiji), it felt like so many things had happened in my life in the last 10 months! From losing the financial security to deciding to move on to a totally new life with a complete unknown in the future, the only thing that gave me the courage and strength to keep going was the trust in my Guru as I took the jump into the path of unknown in my life. To tell you honestly, to take the jump into the unknown requires tremendous courage. Without trust, it is impossible to take that leap of faith. Whenever there is even a slightest doubt, be very clear, we will never take the jump and even if we were to take the jump, it will not be total. If the jump is not total, we will only be badly bruised!

I discovered that once I had taken the jump, wherever I landed would be the right place. All these trials and tribulations that I underwent were nothing but tests from life and the surgery I meant to go through as part of the metamorphosis in becoming Sadashiva (Super Consciousness).

I remembered Swamiji once said that “Life with me will be ecstatic but equally challenging as well because my work is to cause chaos in you, break all your social conditioning and past patterns and show what you are really made of.”

By becoming a disciple, I have made the clear decision to find my Self. In the process of finding my Self, there will be pain because I am losing what I thought I was – that is my ego. The ego is what I have known to be ‘me’ all these years. Coming to the Guru means I have chosen the path of dropping the ego. Trust is the key that allows him to work on the tumour called ego.

Swamiji said “The moment the disciple allows the Master to work on her, the disciple has started her inner journey. The Guru-disciple relationship has no outer world goal, only inner goal because the disciple starts to feel the Master in everything that she does. When this flowering happens, the disciple will radiate the Master’s grace and bliss. Then nothing which happens to her in the outer world will have an emotional impact on her like before. Nothing will disturb her; nothing will have any solid effect on her. She will remain totally centered.”

Swamiji explained the reason why we are so afraid of the unknown because the ego thrives on a secured feeling. When something becomes unknown, the ego feels threatened, it doesn’t know what to do! With fear and insecurity comes hundreds of questions from the mind – Am I doing the right thing? Can I trust him? How do I know if he is my Guru? What if things don’t work out with him? Without the understanding of where these doubts come from, it is very easy to fall prey to our ego. When his work on us is happening, we will feel like escaping, we will feel like dropping everything and run away. By hiding from the Master, we are only escaping from ourselves. This is how we miss the Master or delay the process of enlightenment.

If we allow the Master surgeon to perform the operation of ego, the transformation will happen beautifully. Frankly, to take the leap into the unknown is the greatest thing that one can do for one self once he or she has found the Master. A disciple only needs one thing – openness to allow what has to happen happens with a deep trust in the Master.

With trust, we start to fall in tune with the Master, the feeling of the oneness with him happens. We will be able to move around in the world with complete awareness. Even though we may be living in the society, but we will be completely aware of what is happening, with no clinging to anything. We will be able to experience all the pleasures of life but with no emotional pull or attachment to them. This is the best gift one can receive from the Master. Namaste 😀

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About Teo Siew Yong

Teo Siew Yong draws from over a decade's worth of experience in the Vedic healing arts of Yoga and Mediation to share the sacred knowledge and experiences of self healing and self discovery with people who are ready to look within.